Programming: The Conversation

Our system is frustrated with a lot of the discussion surrounding programming, because much of it is dominated by those who would consider themselves opposed to the existences of systems like my own. As a result, I am frequently excluded from my own community and do not feel much connection to the programmed system community other than the level of community I have created myself.

I have created community by way of Discord servers like Plural Dreams and especially Plural Cove. Both of them are endo-friendly, willo-friendly plural servers that have extensive sections dedicated to discussions of RAMCOA. The links take you to the Neocities sites for those servers. They are open to any adult who is alright with the policies, but Plural Dreams is geared towards endogenic/willogenic plurality, and Plural Cove is geared towards traumagenic plurality. If you join and are verified in one, you will be automatically verified if you join the other.

While this is not nearly as active as my Discord servers are (yet), I also run a Tumblr blog called programmed-headmate-ideas, which is both an extension of our build-a-headmate blog headmate-ideas as well as a pro-endo blog about which questions about programming can be asked. If you want to ask me a question about anything I've said here (so long as the question isn't too personal), or about programming in general, but you don't want to add us on Discord over it, asking on that blog is the way to go, and it has anon enabled.

If you talk to us in private, we are an open book about our programming when allowed to be, and we are happy to answer any questions anyone might have about it. This includes people who share spaces like Discord servers with us (including ones we didn't make), but this also includes anyone who stumbles upon our website and contacts us on Discord to talk about the topic.

We are also happy to answer questions about programming in general for people who might not know much about it, or for other survivors who are curious about our perspectives or base of knowledge about something. We consider ourselves knowledgeable because we have put a lot of time and energy towards researching the topic and talking to survivors, but also because our internal programmers were given extensive knowledge of programming by our abuser in order to help them help him, and they remember a lot of this information.

However, it should be remembered that we have beliefs about programming, including its very definition, that not necessarily everybody shares. For example, some people think solo programming is impossible, and they oversimplify programming to "traumatizing someone into developing DID", when plurality is not even a part of how our system understands the definition of "programming".

We are working on creating a resource about programming that combines information from everything reputable we have seen online or read from published sources, that we remember from our experiences, and that we know from talking to other survivors, in the past and in the present. It also includes pages of speculation that are not presented as fact but that are presented as possible explanations for certain things about programming that are often considered mysterious. It is intended to be a basic guide to a lot of information about programming, including what the alphabet programs are, but presented in the calmest, least triggering way possible.

The resource is in the form of a Twine file and is currently a work in progress, but anybody can privately ask to see the rough draft of it. If you have a copy of it, you can share it with others as long as you include a disclaimer that it's a work in progress. The idea is to upload it to Neocities someday, and possibly to anywhere else to which I can upload a Twine file.

I may also someday create a Neocities site about programming, or at least include some pages on this site that include things like some definitions of terms. The reason that kind of thing would be on my personal site and not on a site specifically dedicated to the topic is that I use phrases like "screen memories" and "drug based mind control" on an everyday basis to talk about my experiences, but not necessarily everybody knows what this means. However, if I create a page on my site that defines those terms, there is less confusion, like how I have a page that defines system roles, including very common ones for the benefit of people I meet online who aren't as familiar with plurality or who may be plural themselves but very new to discovering this.

For now, I spend a lot of time privately discussing programming online for the benefit of other survivors. I consider myself a living resource of sorts, and I hope to someday do things on a grander scale than currently, even if that's just by releasing resources online. For now, though, I know I am doing a lot of good work with the Discord servers I run for programmed systems, and I consider this a very meaningful aspect of what I do with my life.